Have you ever been dumped for someone else? Let me tell you, it can really hurt and be massive blow to your self-esteem (especially if the other guy is better-looking, has a better job, or is just plain cooler than you).
Here’s my story of being dumped for someone else:
My girlfriend was going to school in a small college town about one hundred miles or so away from where I lived. We were doing the whole long distance thing where I would go out and visit her ever other weekend or so, and she’d come and visit me once in a while.
But then one day, she started telling me about this new “guy friend” she had at school. She couldn’t stop talking about how cool he was and how funny he was. I know, I’m a total idiot for not seeing it sooner, but they were definitely getting a little too close for comfort. I guess that’s just me being too naive and trusting.
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Well, anyway, a few months later she called me up and dumped me. I didn’t know I was dumped for someone else at the time. That didn’t come until a few months later when one of my close friends told me that her and her new “guy friend” had hooked up and–get this–they got engaged (!) after only dating for two weeks.
I was like, WTF! Not only was I dumped for someone else, but they went and got engaged?
Wow! That’s a big hit in the gut.
If something like that has happened to you and you’ve been dumped for someone else, here’s what I’m going to suggest you do.
1 – Don’t feel the urge to talk to your ex girlfriend to get answers.
I know that being dumped can leave you with a lot of haunting questions nagging your mind. Was it something you did? Something you didn’t do? Maybe if you just said those “three words” a bit more, things would have worked out differently.
Spare yourself the drama. You’re probably not going to find out. Contacting your ex-girlfriend will likely only make you feel worse as you feel like you’ve been kicked in the balls when you hear about her new relationship and how nauseatingly well it’s going.
2 – Focus on finding things in your life that make you happy.
After a break up, you probably feel like crud. But just sitting around feeling bad about yourself isn’t going to help. Try to change your mindset from one of negativity and pessimism to one of optimism and happiness by finding things in your life that bring you joy.
Take up a new hobby, spend time with your friends, or do whatever it takes to put a smile on your face. One thing I did when I went through my break up was to go hiking in nature a lot. I was fortunate enough to live near my city’s nature arboretum and I got lost in there on many occasions just soaking up the beauty of nature. I also took some time to work on painting and artwork, which has been a lifelong hobby of mine (and let me tell you, that break up sure gave me a lot of inspiration for paintings!).
So, don’t feel bad if you’ve been dumped for someone else. You’re not alone in this, and you’ll definitely find a way to make it through this in one piece.
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